3-28-21

In the last month, since hospice took over Mom's care, things have begun to shift into a different gear. While she is more than willing, her body has other ideas and she is having to take an increased amount of medication to be able to manage the pain of the growing tumor in her lung. This means much more time sleeping and hooked to an oxygen tank while in bed.

Even in the midst of this, she is still very much "herself" and is really feeling the love from family and friends near and far. She's tucked up in her "nest" of a room and enjoying the signs of spring popping up in her beautiful yard. And while the visits are getting briefer, she's appreciated that the vaccine has allowed for more in person hugs. 

None of you will be surprised that she's insisting that I stick to my plans to fly to Holland on Wednesday. Eric and family will be spending special time with her while I'm away and I'm thankful to have a super flexible ticket to fly home at any time, if need be.

Until next time....thanks for your continued love and support! ❤️

Eli, Nana, & Riley (Easter 2004)

2-21-21

A quick update:

Along with getting her second Covid vaccine, Mom completed her radiation treatments last week. The treatments were painful and she hasn’t begun to feel the results yet. The doctor is very hopeful that soon she will begin to feel some relief from pain of her growing tumors. We are so hopeful, too, of course! 

At this point, since she has tried everything, we’ve come to a fork in the road and her care will now be managed by hospice (here at home). They are reassuring -and again, we are hopeful- that this will allow her more comfort and a better quality of life going forward.

It’s not an easy time but we are doing our best to take it as it comes with all the mixed and complex emotions that arise, as they do.

~~~~

It has been fun and meaningful to continue to discover old treasures and wonderful photos.

I love the birth announcement that Mimi & Papa made for Mom. Can you tell Papa was in the Navy when she was born? So, so sweet.

He sent her this hula skirt from Hawaii. 

So many touching moments.

Mom & Charlotte (who was just here for a visit yesterday!) at 16.

Thanks for continuing to send your love. 

We can feel it.

❤️

2-5-2021

Wow, it has already been two months since our last update!

Mom has been doing well emotionally but having an increasingly difficult time of it physically. She tried one final round of chemo but it was decided that it was coming at too high a cost for the minimal (if any) benefits. Keeping on top of the increasing amount of pain medication necessary has been wearing thin.

Now she is set to begin a series of five radiation treatments on the tumors in her lung and in her hip bones. Her radiation oncologist is confident that this will reduce her pain by a considerable level, which is hopeful.

Happily, Isabel came for a visit in early January which is the best kind of medicine.

She, Chelsea and I had fun sorting out Mom’s beautiful earring collection and hearing stories about where they came from as we went.

Han arrived from Holland the following week for a visit and has been a big help in so many ways. Besides bringing his sunny spirit, he immediately installed a saftey rail in the shower and a new banister making it much easier (or at least safer) for mom to get up and down the stairs.

Han and I have taken a couple of mini-trips while he’s been here to explore the Pacific Northwest, Riley and Eric took turns filling in while we were away which was a win/win for all.

At this point, Mom is looking forward to being able to reduce her pain medication thanks to her upcoming radiation. She also wants to express her gratitude for all the messages of support, meals, and visits from so many of you!

12-5-20

It has been awhile since Mom's last update...mostly because there hasn't been much new news to report. This week, though, she had another CT scan and yesterday she saw the oncologist for the results. He shared that the cancer growth was holding steady...with some possible shrinkage, which is good news. He wasn't sure if this was due to her latest rounds of chemo or just the nature of the cancer itself.

The current plan is to continue her chemo for the next few weeks and then take a break before scanning again. This will give her a welcomed reprieve from the side effects of the chemo and hopefully more information about how to proceed going forward. 

Overall, she is juggling the medication and the physical effects as well as possible. While I've been in Holland for the last month, she has really enjoyed special one on one time with Eric, Shawn, Chelsea, & Riley. She is currently enjoying time with Zack again, who is back for two weeks (able to do his training online from her house). I arrive back on the 14th so we will be celebrating an early Christmas while we're all together.

We're sure grateful for FaceTime which makes it possible to visit with each other from across the world...and that it enabled her to be part of of my wedding day from over 4,000 miles away: a real cause for celebration for our family amidst this challenging year! We can't wait to get her over here in person to celebrate as soon as the world opens back up again!

She appreciates family and friends keeping in touch and is sending lots of love during this holiday season!

9-30-20

Just a quick update to share that Mom is doing as well as can be. She has completed 6 weekly treatments of chemo and has 3 more to go. This round of treatment has had less side effects. It seems to have helped her cough and to have given her more energy. But, her pain level is still high. She's having to manage that by taking a lot of medication, which is tricky to stay on top of at times. It has also caused her to lose her hair.

Throughout it all, though, she is still very much herself: keeping up with world events...enjoying the home she has put so much of her heart into over the years, playing (and winning!) lots of Rummikub...watering her giant, beautiful, garden....and staying connected with family and friends over video, phone, email, texts (and sometimes even in person visits!).

We recently came across this old photo album my grandpa made while he was away in the Navy, separated from my grandma and mom.

How sweet to see how beloved she has been from her earliest days.

❤️

Until next time!

Happy Birthday!

 Happy 77th Birthday, Mom!

I hope you feel all the love coming your way today-from all around the world!

You are definitely my superhero.

Celebrating you today.

And every day.

Happy, happy, birthday, Mom. 

Ik hou van jou...with all my heart!

❤️❤️❤️

8-15-20

A quick update to share that Mom has started her latest round of chemo. The plan is for her to have weekly infusions (three weeks on/one week off) for the next few months. The hope is that it will stop or slow the growth of the cancer and that she will feel less pain as it goes.

As some of you may have heard, I am taking off for Holland today (!) for a month. Happily, Zack is still off work and is able to stay with Mom while I'm away. He'll be taking her to all of her appointments and I know they will enjoy this special time together.

 Mom shared this poem with me today and it seemed fitting to share it here.

Allow

There is no controlling life.

Try corralling a lightening bolt,

containing a tornado. 

Dam a stream and it 

will create a new channel. 

Resist, and the tide

will wipe you off your feet. 

Allow, and grace will carry you 

to higher ground. 

The only safety lies in

letting it all in-

the wild and the weak;

fears, fantasies,

failures and success. 

When loss rips off the doors of the heart,

or sadness veils your vision with despair,

practice simply becomes bearing the truth.

In the choice to let go 

of your known way of being,

the whole world is revealed to your eyes. 

~Danna Faulds